Baby Makes Five (A Multiple Birth Book 1) Page 11
“Okay I’ll be there when I can,” he said and hung up.
Her ear perked up, “Problems?” she asked innocently.
“Yes, I need to stop by the office to deal with an issue. I’ll take you to your place and come and get you when I am done. I’m sorry Miah.”
“There’s no need to be, take your time. I’m not going anywhere,” she said, happily now that she could get a breather from him.
“Don’t pack your things until I get back. I’ll help you or if Amanda is home let her do it for you. I need you to rest, maybe have a nap. I’ll try to be quick.”
“Okay as I said no need to rush back to me. I am not going to do anything stupid. I’ll just watch a movie or something if I don’t feel like sleeping.”
“Are you sure because--”
“I am a hundred percent sure, deal with your business before your empire
crumbles.”
“Alright but I am taking you up,” he said getting out of the car as he pulled up to her apartment.
He lifted her into his arms and walked towards the building.
“What are you doing, I can walk,” she said noticing the stares they were getting.
“Why walk when I can carry you. Remember Dr. Sand said no walking.”
She rolled her eyes as he entered the elevator and pressed the number for her floor. He took the key from her and opened the door when they got off and sat her on the couch.
“Do you need anything before I leave water, juice, milk, a snack?”
“No thank you. Go ahead the more you linger here, the longer you’ll be at your office.”
“Okay take it easy and relax,” he said kissing her forehead and left reluctantly.
She had just found a romantic comedy movie she hadn’t seen in a while when there was a knock at the door. She groaned, it hadn’t been fifteen minutes since he had left, and he was back so soon? She got up slowly and waddled to the door.
“You do have my key use it,” she said looking up into eyes that didn’t belong to Ash but looked familiar to her. The man before her was older maybe in his fifties.
“May I help you?” she asked
“Hello Miah,” the man said expectantly.
“Hello, do I know you?” she asked confused
“No, I guess you don’t. My name is Benjamin Clarke; I’m your—.”
“I know who you are,” she said and with that, she slammed the door shut.
8
The sperm donor that is who he was, he wasn’t her father, as he stated. He was just the man who had gotten her mother pregnant and left them both without a backward glance. So what did he want with her twenty years later? Did he come here to beg her for a kidney or did he want a piece of her lung or her blood? Whatever it is, she wasn’t about to hand anything of hers over to him, no matter how sick he was. She would rather die than give him any part of her.
There wasn’t any other explanation for his sudden appearance in her life. She was positive he didn’t suddenly have the urge to be paternal and looked up the child he abandoned years ago. She had questions she wanted answers to. The card he slipped under the door with his contact information two days ago was burning a hole in her jean’s pocket.
She had made three attempts to call the number he left but had chickened out. She knew who she was; she didn’t need him to tell her that. She wasn’t a child anymore trying to understand what she did wrong for him not to want or love her. She already made peace with that part of her parentage, or so she had thought until she found herself looking up into eyes identical to hers.
She rubbed her stomach soothingly trying to calm the storm that was raging inside her. She needed to make the call and get him the hell out of her life before stress and hatred eat her alive.
“Thank you for seeing me,” Ben said taking a seat on the couch.
“Don’t thank me yet. I want to know what you want and how you found me.”
He nodded understanding what she meant. “I had a private investigator look for you. That's how I found you.”
“I see. Whatever the reason it must be very important then. You spending that much time and money looking for me,” she said.
He only nodded. “I was sorry to hear of your mother’s death. She was a good woman.”
“Yes, she was. You say you are sorry, yet I don’t recall seeing a sympathy card or a bouquet of flowers from you. I know you’re not here because of my mother. You want something from me, so get it over with and tell me what it is that you want.”
“I understand you may have questions about me about my relationship with your mother. I am happy to answer them.”
“That’s very noble of you,” she sneered, “my mother told me all I needed to know about you. Don’t worry, she has never once said a negative thing about you, that was my job, and I constantly got chasten for doing so.”
“She was always classy that way. She didn’t believe in saying anything about someone if she couldn’t say something good. I respected that,” he said with a hint of a smile.
“I am sure you do, but we all know you didn’t earn her loyalty or deserve it. Let’s just stop with the mindless chitchat and get to the point. Why are you here? I don’t have all day.” She knew she was rude, but the man before her was someone she had never wanted to meet. He was the only person on this planet she hated.
He cleared his throat “you have a fourteen-year-old brother and eighteen-year-old twin sisters.”
She laughed. She couldn’t help it. “Are you kidding me?”
“Pardon?”
“You have three children after you told my mother to get rid of me because you didn’t want kids. Apparently right away, since your twins are two years younger than I am. You gave her an ultimatum either you or me and here you are telling me that you have three teenage kids. You are priceless.”
“At the time I –”
She held up a hand “I don’t need your sugar coated excuses. I am curious to know what made you change your mind. What does your wife have that my mother didn’t, is it money?”
“Miah… it’s not like that. I loved your mother it was just--.”
“It’s just what? You’re fumbling here let’s speed things up shall we. What do you want or which one of your cherished children needs something from me?” she asked. She was beginning to get irritated.
He sighed in defeat, “Your brother Kevin has leukemia and needs a bone marrow transplant. Melanie and Sarah aren't a match; neither are my wife Joy and I. I was hoping that you would volunteer to get tested to see if you are a match for him.”
“Wow, you must love your son to come begging. You must have gone through all the scenarios in your head about the possible outcome of coming here, yet you came. That must have taken some soul searching, but I am thinking its guts since I doubt you have a soul. Someone with a soul would feel at least a little guilt. Wow.” It was all she could say holding back the anger that was bubbling up within her.
“I know it’s a lot to ask, but he’s your brother, that should count for something,” he reasoned.
“Are you kidding me? Are you going to play that card and expect me to feel something for a man who couldn’t give a shit about me, and a brother I never met or knew existed?
“First of all, I have no siblings. The man who helped fathered me is a mere sperm donor. Secondly, you discarded my mother and I. You never once sent a birthday card or called to see if we were okay. You come here not to apologize for the crap and heartache you put her through, but you expect me to hand over my DNA to your son because I accidentally share your DNA? Now I have something you need you think my life is worth something?”
“You have every right to be mad at me, but this isn’t about me. It’s about a young boy who needs your help. I’ve wanted to call to see if you both were okay so many times—.”
“Then what stopped you? Once would have been enough for her, to show that at one time you cared for her. You should have done it for her. She deserved that much.”
She felt disbelief. “I would have to care to be angry, and anger would be too kind for the hatred I feel for you. I am truly sorry your son is sick, but I can’t help you.” There was no need to tell him she was pregnant since he wouldn’t care anyway. She was sure she couldn’t donate even if she wanted to. She would have to ask her doctor about that.
“Please Miah, I am begging you, we have exhausted all our options,” he said desperately.
She wanted to ask what his son’s life was worth, but didn’t, because that would be cruel. As much as she wanted this man to suffer, she wasn’t about to do it by using his sons’ misfortune. Karma exists, and he would get what’s coming to him eventually.
“Have you had him added to the donor registry?”
“As I said we’ve exhausted every avenue. He’s on the list, but there are people who are sicker ahead of him. If he doesn’t get a donor within the next six months, he will die.”
“So I was a last minute afterthought? I am truly sorry, but I really can’t help you. You’ve wasted your time coming here, but I am not the answer to your prayers. Maybe ask the public, appeal to their humanity.”
“Miah… if you change your mind, and I hope you do. Here’s the information. Family is always a better chance of a match. I am sorry we met under these circumstances. Thank you for your time.”
He got up and placed a business card on the coffee table and walked towards the door. She wanted to sniff in disdain, family her ass.
“Does your family know what kind of man you are, the real you? Do they even know about me?” she asked softly before he left.
He turned face blank and shoulders drooped. He looked tired and older somehow than when he had arrived. She didn’t even notice how white his hair was and wondered if it had been that colour when he first shown up at the apartment two days ago. She felt sorry for him, even pitied him.
He looked at her with eyes so much like hers. He was defeated, and they both knew it. “No, I didn’t want to get their hopes up,” he said sighing.
“I see,” but she didn’t, if she were in his place she wouldn’t have left any stone unturned. Then again, she wouldn’t have abandoned her child.
“Miah I am sorry—”
She held up her hand fighting the tears that were welling up behind her eyes and shook her head tiredly. She didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry. “Go. I don’t know you. I don’t want to know you. I hope your son gets a donor, but as of today, I want to forget that you exist like you forgot I did. I want you never to contact me again. As of now, I’m dead to you. Goodbye.”
He nodded and left without another word or backward glance. It wasn’t something that was difficult for him.
She closed her eyes tightly shutting off the tears. He didn’t care for her and didn’t deserve her tears. He didn’t have a problem coming to ask for her help, yet he didn’t think it was important to tell his family that she existed. She was to remain his dirty secret. How could he be sorry if this is what she was to him?
Did he even look at her and feel any remorse over his actions? Did he even think to ask how she was? How was she coping without her one parent? Or notice that she was pregnant with his grandchildren? No, all he wanted was to save the child he chose to love not caring who he hurt in the process.
Thankfully, the only thing she had inherited from him was her eyes. She could never be as cruel or selfish as he is. She placed a protective hand on her stomach. She knew what fear felt like when it comes to the possibility of losing one’s child. She would call her doctor and find out if she was eligible for the test.
***
“Miah?” Ash called walking into the family room. He came home after a long and tiring day to meet her asleep on the couch. He enjoyed the domesticated bliss of her waiting for him each evening. They had developed a routine since she moved in. Most days she was up reading a book or watching a movie until he came home. She must have been tired if she was sleeping so deeply she didn’t hear his approach.
He walked over to where she slept peacefully and pulled the knitted throw over her legs. Sign of her pregnancy was everywhere. Her face had filled out. Her breasts were fuller. Her feet were swollen, and her stomach had rounded with life.
“You’re home,” she said sleepily sitting up running a hand through her hair.
She looked more tired than usual “are you okay?” He asked caressing her cheek.
“Yes, how was your day, did you get the Teamster contract?”
“Of course, I always do,” he said wiggling his eyebrows because he knew it constantly made her laugh. She looked like she can do with some laughter.
He succeeded. “Of course, you always do,” she said laughing.
She hugged him impulsively holding onto him tightly. She needed to feel his warmth and strength. When his arms closed around her, she inhaled his musky scent and felt the day’s event slowly washing away. Being here with him was her life, her family. He was home and happiness to her. She pulled back at the thought and cleared her throat. It was the first time she had hugged him since the morning she had woken up bleeding.
He must have sensed something was wrong. “Kate told me you had a visitor today,” he said sitting next to her.
The dip in the couch sent her sliding closer to him. She didn’t answer for a while just sat there enjoying his company, the peace he brought to her. “Miah what’s going on?” he asked, taking her cold hands in his forcing her to face him.
She tried to smile but failed. “My father or as I call him the sperm donor showed up asking me to donate my DNA to save his son.”
“What?”
“The man who didn’t want me or any children has a wife, a fourteen-year-old son and eighteen-year-old twin girls. The son has leukemia and needs a bone marrow transfusion. No one in his family is a match. He had twin girls right after leaving my mother.” She said looking at him. “He didn’t even wait, he…he threw my mother away and moved on like she was nothing to him. Like I was nothing,” she whispered on a sob.
“Oh baby why didn’t you call me? I would have been here for you. I would have thrown him out.”
“I know. I didn’t think it was too important.”
“Obviously, it is if you are crying. I don’t like knowing someone hurt you.”
“I know. That’s why I didn’t tell you. I didn’t think he could hurt me any more than he already did,” she said honestly.
“What happened to make you cry as you are now? What did he do, what did he say? I’ll wring his neck if—”
“Shh,” she said putting a finger to his lips. “It was my fault. I asked him on his way out if his family knew about me, I thought with him coming here…”
“They don’t know do they?”
She nodded “he didn’t want to give them false hope. He didn’t have a problem asking for my bone marrow, yet he thought it would be wrong if his family knew about me. I am his dirty secret Ash, how many times could a father deny your existence? It’s like he felt nothing when he looked at me.”
“If you want, I can have him killed. I know a guy.”
She laughed, “he’s not worth the effort, I told him never to contact me again.”
“Good, but I have a feeling, he, at least, guilt you into wanting to get tested,” he said knowing how her heart works.
“He did. I called Dr. Sand. I can’t have the test done because I am pregnant. I’ll do it after I give birth.”
“If that is what you want to do. Forget the guilt he is laying on you, what do you want?” he asked even thought he had an idea what the answer is.
“It is what I want to do. He is right; I shouldn’t take out how I feel about him on his son. I have the card with the information I’ll give it to Dr. Sand. After I give birth, I’ll get tested. If I’m a match, I’ll donate as an anonymous donor. I don’t want
him knowing it’s me.”
“Okay, whatever decision you make I am there with you once it doesn’t harm you. How long does he have, how soon does he need the marrow?”
“I know you will be there. Now would be good, but he has six months, or he dies. I hope someone donates before then. If not, I hope I could help him.”
“Me too, is there anything I can do?”
“Maybe look into seeing if there are any trials going on, or a way to get a donor sooner. Anything you can do to help I would appreciate it.”
“You are welcome. You know I’ll do anything for you don’t you?” he asked hugging her.
“I know. Think of it this way, what if it was Micah, Alina or Grace wouldn’t you have done the same thing he did?”
“Yes I would have done everything I possibly could, but I will never ask a woman to abort my child or abandon her when she didn’t. I would have been a presence in its life from the beginning.”
“You are not all men Ash, and I am fortunate that you are in my life.”
“I am the one who is lucky.”
“I am not doing this for him. I am doing it because it’s the right thing to do. I don’t want this on my conscience.”
“What did he say when you told him?”
“I didn’t. I told him I can’t and wish him luck.”
“So he has no idea…”
“No, and I want to keep it that way.”
***
Things were moving along well as could be expected for someone in her situation. She hated being on bed rest, coped up inside but had come to terms with that. Ash was her savior always finding things to keep her busy. He had even suggested keeping a diary outlining her experience through pregnancy, an idea that never occurred to her. Each day and week were a milestone for them. She had just entered her thirtieth week, and her cervix has stayed closed since her cerclage, something they both were grateful for. The babies were healthy and thriving.
Things were going well with them. They were getting to know each other better, and each day she fell more in love with him. At times, she would find him looking at her with a smile of contentment on his face, at other times, she saw the naked hunger in his eyes.